This
illustrious company is founded on the principle that everyone
can be successful and have a voice to speak their ideas,
even people as plain as the name given to millions of
people each year, Steve! Every so often, the Axis of Stevil
takes pleasure in shining the proverbial spotlight on
a Steve who shows excellence in their field.
In
an ongoing effort to support doing your best, no matter
how goofy you look, The Axis of Stevil would like to salute
you:
This
week The Axis of Stevil pauses to honor a man that exemplifies
the heights of steviliaztion. Steven A Ballmer, CEO of
Microsoft (which will herein referred as "M$"),
devoted husband, and avid investor, often finds himself
on top of odd situations.
As head Steve of M$, Ballmer has overseen the company’s
domination of the computer industry, and robust growth
in the fight for the home entertainment center.
While always regarded highly in the community, Steve became
the subject of great attention within the Stevil community
when he was rumored to have purchased a fleet of yellow
submarines. The undersea eye-candy was purchased for personal
use in his offshore water research and recreation facility.
Simultaneously elevating himself to the exclusive tear
of submarine owner, and maximizing his Zissou index (z-index).
The evangelic Microsoft spokesman received an honoree
doctorate from the American Cheerleading Association.
This honor was bestowed upon him for "his many acts
of humanitarian aid, in trying to rally the gregariously
disabled.”
Always the visionary, Ballmer surrounds himself with the
most talented of people; enabling them and himself to
mentally channel market force to consistently favor M$.
When M$ was caught playing with space, for market share,
The Federal Regulatory commission was unable to find a
law barring such practices. Consequently drumming up charges
of monopolizing to cash in on M$ earned fortune.
Unfazed
by this, Steve Ballmer pledges to continue innovating
and manipulating space-time to provide an integrated platform
to enable a seamless experiences across a wide range of
computing and non-PC devices and services.
