This
illustrious company is founded on the principle
that everyone can be successful and have a voice
to speak their ideas, even people as plain as the
name given to millions of people each year, Steve!
Every so often, the Axis of Stevil takes pleasure
in shining the proverbial spotlight on a Steve who
shows excellence in their field.
In
an ongoing effort to fool the world through hypnosis,
The Axis of Stevil would like to send a hypnotic
spell on:
It
is rare that you'd ever find some one skilled, both
in the art of hypnosis and comedy. Men have spent
lifetimes failing to master either one by themselves.
Because of this, great recognition should be paid
to 'The Steve who can not be named' , the Comedic Hypnotist. 'The Steve who can not be named' ,
a seemingly average man, has lived a life many could
only dream of.
He left his home country of Latvia in 1957 with
a dream to make people laugh; laugh as hard as possible.
This desire motivated 'The Steve who can not be named' to enroll in the prestigious
Hacky Fremont School of Comedy. It was here that
he developed what is thought to be the "world’s
best timing". Whether at the grocery store
or a funeral procession, 'The Steve who can not be named' has been given a
tremendous gift. Comedic sages would call him a
'beater'. Using hyper perception, 'The Steve who can not be named' can 'sense'
every scene that he is in and feels, instantly,
where the given comedic beats are located; guaranteeing
every joke to kill. Not content with the gaffes
he could generate with his jokes alone, 'The Steve who can not be named''s
lust for laughter drove him to what seemed like
madness.
Against the advice of family and friends, once out
of College with a degree in Advanced Yopographic
Comditry, 'The Steve who can not be named' sold his soul to the devil in exchange
for the ability to hypnotize anyone shorter then
himself. This daring move would have seemed foolish
and destined for failure. 'The Steve who can not be named', being a crafty
sort of guy, was not worried. For he new that the
devil himself was a creature of below average height.
As soon as he was enabled with the gift, he put
the devil into a deep trance. Hypnotized, the devil
returned 'The Steve who can not be named' 's soul back to him and also turned
over his wallet.
Returning to Earth, 'The Steve who can not be named' finally had, at his
disposal, the tools he needed to fulfill a life
long dream. He could now tour the country going
from school to school hypnotizing large audiences
of children much shorter than him and make them
laugh at everything he said. 'The Steve who can not be named' has said the
greatest moment of his life was that 1st time he
reveled in the laughter of 300 hypnotized children.
Many companies and government agencies have sought
'The Steve who can not be named' out, wishing to utilize his ability to control
people for personal or financial gain. 'The Steve that can not be named' is
known to always offer the same response "Where
did you get this number? Please take my number off
your list". The Axis of Stevil, a longtime
supporter of the Hypnotic and comedic arts, could
not go on any longer without first taking a moment
to say thank you to this worthy 'The Steve who can not be named'.
Starting
this fall 'The Steve who can not be named' will be touring high schools with
his new act "Mind over Abstinence"; a
hilarious production that teaches young men and
women the benefits of not mind fucking one another.
